Monday, February 27, 2006

Classics

I wanted to share with you all, my most recent and classic review from TAXI Listener ID # 225:

Overall Comments:
"Sali, you're a great singer. I can't forward recordings like these. I hear your good songs and voice, but these productions totally distract. Honestly, I think these productions are closing doors for you. I have been instructed not to address production issues in general because we're supposed to help you more with various writing ideas, but your recordings are your issue. You don't need bigger, better productions, but you should give yourself or a different producer a new try. Model your productions and singing style after the artists suggested. You will never succeed in winning the approval of someone looking for Fiona Apple with your current production aesthetic. You do not need a studio. You can use a guitar or piano, but you must tap into a current, cool aesthetic.

Bio Comments:
"In your bio, after yo rework your songs, compare yourself to three artists, then talk about your career goals and accomplishments. Don't sell yourself as some NY swinging club diva girl. There's no future in that except to be that. This listing is looking for a simple, low key artist."

OK, it was my own fault for submitting to a Fiona Apple clone listing, but is it my imagination or was she a bit catty and sexist for alluding to me (and anyone who's not low key) being nothing more than a common whore with no hope of a future as a real, respectable artist?

What is your definition of a classic?